Women still at pains to negotiate safe sex

By Moses Chibaya

More than three decades have gone by since the emergence of HIV, which causes AIDS, yet women in Zimbabwe still find it difficult to negotiate safe sex.
Medical experts say unprotected sex has been found to be the major driver of the pandemic, with 90 percent of infections resulting from such practices. And the problem is affecting almost all age groups, with married as well as single women being exposed.

Precious Maswera, a university student, has witnessed relatives and college mates dying from AIDS. But she says that knowledge did not help her when she fell in love with her boyfriend.

“I was afraid to ask my boyfriend to wear condoms because of the favours he offered me. He would do all niceties, though I knew my life was more important than the financial security,” she narrated.

Maswera contracted a Sexually Transmitted Infection (STI) which, she said was a clear warning that she could fall in the same dilemma as some of her relatives and college mates.

She said she received counselling from a nurse at the clinic where she went to seek medical attention; and she started negotiating for safe sex “explaining to him that unprotected sex put us at risk of contracting STIs and AIDS. He agreed after some resistance.”

The 20-year-old woman also said a number of her college mates are going out with ‘Madhara’ (a term used for sugar daddies), because they get all sorts of things their parents cannot afford to give them.

Taizivei Bachi, 30, is a mother of four, including an infant who was born with the virus.
She said when she tested HIV positive in April 1999, she had lived with her husband for 12 years, had never had a relationship with another man, while her husband also never showed any signs of infidelity though she sometimes suspected.
Although women are now able to join professions like medicine, law, building and even committing crimes like robbery, rape, theft, shoplifting and all other forms of vice, they are still unable to decide in bed.

Rights campaigners say poverty, gender-based violence, economic factors, lack of empowerment, inequalities, as well as socio-cultural practices compromise women’s ability to negotiate safe sex.

Virginia Muwanigwa, a gender rights advocate and director of the Humanitarian Information Facilitation Centre (HIFC) said: “Culturally, women are disadvantaged in that society uses different barometers for women and men in terms of sex and sexuality.
“As long as women in relationships are subservient to men, they are unequal partners in any negotiation.”

The Research and Information Coordinator of the Alternatives to Neo-liberalism in Southern Africa (ANSA) also said there was need to address gender issues in a “holistic and comprehensive framework, speaking to communities about the need for empowering women.”

Tendai Makanza said this should be carried out in a manner that also addresses power relations between men and women.

She added, “Promoting safe sex should not just be centered on building the negotiating power of women. Messages must be focused also on how safe sex decisions are beneficial for both partners.”

However, Dr Nyaradzo Mgodi, the Project Director of Virginal Oral Interventions (VOICE), said today’s prevention options – condom use and mutual monogamy – are not feasible for millions of people, especially women.
She said, “Women desperately need methods for preventing HIV that they can control themselves. ARV-based prevention methods – as either a vaginal gel or an oral tablet – are promising approaches.”
Dr Mgodi said Tenofovir gel is a vaginal microbicide that contains the same active ingredient as the oral tablet formulation of Tenofovir.

She said Microbicides are products designed to prevent or reduce the sexual transmission of HIV when applied topically on the inside of the vagina or rectum.
Jessie Majome, Deputy Minister of Gender and Women’s Affairs, said for women to be able to negotiate for safe sex there is need for economic, social and psychological empowerment. And they should also access various necessities to life.

She also said, “Empowering women implies recognition that women legitimately have the ability to, and should, individually and collectively participate effectively in decision-making processes that shape their societies and their own bodies and lives.”
However, the HIFC Director said research has shown that even in some cases where women are economically independent, safe sex negotiations may remain premised on power relations between men and women, based on traditions – culture and religion.
Muwanigwa said, “… some empowerment comes with increased control over economic resources, (and in) some cases, this has not been enough to tilt the power scales in favour of women, who may still not be bold enough to insist on protection. Indirectly, however, that power may be diluted where they (women) are offered less money.”

Most women die in silence as the environment is not conducive for them to discuss issues to do with sex, especially practicing safe sex.

Age and economic disparities encourage female passivity, decreasing women’s ability to abstinence or negotiate safe sexual practices, including use of condoms.
HIV and AIDS activist, Tendayi Westerhof, said women are at pains to negotiate for safe sex because they fear their spouses may accuse them of infidelity if they propose the use of condoms.
Westerhof said religion plays a role as the church promotes faithfulness, putting many women at risk of contracting HIV “because the marriage institution is no longer a safe haven, with little or no discussion about condoms.”

Makanza, the ANSA official, said power balances between men and women remains skewed in favour of men, which makes it very difficult for women not only to voice a choice, but to also enforce decisions.

Meanwhile, Jonah Gokova, who is the Chairperson of Padare-Enkundleni, said his organisation trains affiliated members to be gender sensitive, respect women rights and practise safe sex.

He said, “We encourage men to engage in safe sex, highlighting that safe sex is not forced sex. Safe sex also means the respect of women by men. Sex must never be associated with harmful practices: if a woman says no, she means no.”

In negotiating safe sex, condom promoters in Zimbabwe encourage married women to view the female condom not as an HIV-prevention tool, but as a means to avert unintended pregnancies. This enables a woman to avoid accusing her husband of having other partners and putting her at risk.

Mgodi said in Zimbabwe young women are five times more likely to be infected with HIV than young men.

Zimbabwe has HIV and AIDS as well as gender policies in place, but they have not translated into practical benefits for a large number of women and their children.
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